There's Gold in Them Litter Boxes

one of my coworkers asked me if i knew what the most expensive coffee is in the world. i don't drink coffee. it once took me two years to use up a starbucks gift card and it was only because i gave it away to someone who drank coffee.

she tells me it's a coffee from indonesia which is translated in chinese as "cat poo* coffee". the actual name is kopi luwak. cats eat coffee berries and then poop** the beans out whole. then the beans are picked out from the poop, cleaned, dried, roasted and then brewed into a cup of joe. it's not as bitter as a regular coffee and the aroma is suppose to be intense (i bet). an ounce of this is about $500.

i was disgusted by all this but it wasn't because someone out there was drinking coffee brewed from cat poop but that someone was paying so much for it. $500 for cat poo coffee? i'm sorry, i mean coffee beans leftover from cat defecation. yum.

i was almost tempted to start raising cats to make this coffee. i do know someone with cats, lots of them. well, they're not hers but they belong to her mom. as i was about to embark upon my plans of building a life upon people drinking poop, i learned it wasn't your typical household cat but a wild jungle cat which looks like it's been crossbred with a monkey. since i don't have readily access to a asian palm civet this plan will have to wait.

i do wonder though if i could feed jesse coffee beans just to test it out.

"don't forget our promise. we must never feed each other poo." - allen j (referring to jocelyn)

*poo
–noun informal
1. excrement.
–verb (used without object) pooed, poo·ing.
2. to defecate.
3. champagne. (From shampoo.) : How about another glass of poo?

**poop
[slang]
–noun
1. excrement.
–verb (used without object)
2. to defecate.
Origin:
1735–45; earlier “to break wind,” probably the same word as Middle English powpen, popen to sound or blow a horn

from dictionary.com